….or “After I Got Out From Behind Bars, I Was “Bour-Born” Again” 😉
I was so distraught and melancholy at the conclusion of Canada’s 150th dessert month, that there was only one way to drown my sorrows. You guessed it. Bourbon. But how to consume it midday (or early morning for that matter – I think there’s a reason “Breakfast Bourbon” sounds so deliciously alliterative 😉 . Also, I would definitely watch a movie called “The Breakfast Bourbon Club”. You know you’d watch that too, so stop pretending like you’re too sophisticated for such vulgarity) in a socially acceptable way that doesn’t make it look like I have an alcohol problem? (Ummm….Amber, you just made a “joke” about drinking Bourbon for breakfast. If you’re trying to convince people you don’t have an alcohol problem, I believe that ship has sailed – a ship that hopefully your clearly drunken ass is not sailing, and not only because you don’t have a boating license 😉 . *Note/ disclaimer: in case anyone’s actually concerned, I have never in my life consumed alcohol for breakfast (no judgement if you have though), this is all just me being nonsensical. I was just being hopeful that y’all know me well enough by now to know I tend toward hyperbole (also, proof of sobriety? The use of the word “hyperbole”. I think a fun game to play the next time you’re in a situation of drunken debauchery would be to get people debating how to pronounce hyperbole. Fun times and possible fisticuffs may ensue).
Complete side note (although I don’t know, is it a side note when I do this kind of thing all the time? What would I call it otherwise though? “Usual note”? “Center note”? …I think I like center note, so let’s go with that), writing the word fisticuffs made me for some random reason wonder about its etymology. I know my own personal first hearing of it was from the musical “Oliver!”. I had a pretty strong feeling though that it wasn’t a word that was invented by the writers of the musical (or by Charles Dickens for that matter). In the interest of making my brain musings your brain musings, I will share my search results with you. This sharing will be rather depressing to be perfectly honest, I was hoping for something whimsical and interesting, however, according to the online etymology dictionary:
“fisticuffs (n.) c. 1600, fisty cuffes, from fist (n.) + cuff (n.) “a blow” (see cuff (v.2)), with the form perhaps in imitation of handiwork.”
or from Wiktionary:
“fist + cuff (“blow with the hand”). ”
So it comes from “fist” + “cuffs”???!!!!! Earth shattering, that’s what that is 😉 .
Good lord Amber, when are you going to get to the point of this post already??!! Are you sure you didn’t have bourbon for breakfast? 😉 . Ok, sorry. This week, I bring you some deliciously boozy salted chocolate chunk bourbon bars. I extra upped the bourbon in these (because…bourbon) by replacing the water I’d usually add to my egg replacer of choice (which is the lazy man’s egg replacer because it’s easy to use, lasts forever and I can get anywhere and everywhere. This is in no way a product endorsement. It’s an endorsement of how lazy I can be), with bourbon instead. Genius? Yes.
Now, thanks to the magic of in-home baking, even if you’re barred from the bars, you won’t be barred from these bars (I ❤alliteration).
Yield: 16 bars
- 1 cup dark brown sugar
- 1/4 cup vegan butter + 2 tablespoons vegan butter, divided
- 1 cup flour
- 1 teaspoon baking powder
- 1/2 teaspoon instant coffee
- 1/2 teaspoon salt
- 1 egg replacer (if you want it extra bourbony, use bourbon in place of water in your egg replacer)
- 1 tablespoon vanilla
- 2 tablespoons bourbon
- 1 cup chocolate, chopped (or just use chocolate chips/chunks if that’s all you have)
- 2 tablespoons cookie butter (or nut/seed butter of choice)
- 1/4 cup vegan butter
- 1/4 cup maple syrup
- 1/2 teaspoon maple extract
- 1 teaspoon molasses (optional)
- pinch of coarse sea salt
- 1/2 teaspoon fleur de sel or coarse salt
- Lightly grease an 8×8 glass dish and preheat oven to 350F.
- In a small saucepan, heat the brown sugar and 1/4 cup butter, stirring occasionally until brown sugar is somewhat dissolved. Move to a larger bowl, set aside and allow to cool.
- In a medium sized bowl, sift together flour, baking powder, instant coffee and salt and set aside.
- Add egg replacer, vanilla, salt and bourbon to the butter mixture and beat together.
- Stir in the flour and then the chocolate, stirring until combined.
- To make caramel, combine vegan butter, maple syrup, maple extract and molasses in a microwavable bowl, and heat for about a minute. Whisk in cookie butter and coarse sea salt.
- Spread half the batter in the pan, swirl over caramel (I didn’t use it all, I had about 1/4 cup left over, you just want enough to have a layer of caramel), then top with remaining batter and bake 20-25 minutes, until light golden brown, being very careful not to over bake. It’ll still look liquidy when you pull it out, just the edges should look a bit firm. It’ll firm up as it cools, so don’t be alarmed.
- Sprinkled with fleur de sel or corase sea salt.
- Allow to cool completely in the pan before slicing into squares.