She Might Be Easy, But I Hear She’s a Good Lay(er)

I apologize if you were shocked/appalled/outraged at this headline, but it was way too awesome for me not to use (although I’m obviously biased 😉 ). I suppose I should’ve tried to be a bit more equal opportunity/ gender equality about it though, I shouldn’t just assume that my dessert was female. Here’s my manly version so you can stop feeling like I’m just sexualizing women – “He Might Be a P’Layer’, But He Sure Looks Tasty”. There, is everyone mollified now? 😉

It was recently book club time again. I’d originally been going to bring the Texas sheet cake cookies that I made the other week, but alas, due to circumstances beyond everyone’s control, book club got delayed a week (or we had to “re-book” it if you will 😉 ), and the cookies most definitely did not survive that long 😉 . I still wanted to bring something of course, but Kevin and I had been at the cottage the weekend before so I didn’t really have time to go into creating some sort of book-club worthy masterpiece. What could I make that would be quick, easy and delicious? I decided to go the route many people go when they’re trying to figure out what to have for dinner and notice that they have a bunch of random leftovers in their fridge. Yes, these were born out of the fact that I had a bunch of leftovers from previous recipes that I hadn’t been sure how I would use up. Leftover homemade coconut butter, toasted coconut, homemade sunflower seed butter and melted chocolate with coconut oil coating (You totally have these things in your fridge too right? I think they’re kind of standards 😉 ). Toss a little maple syrup in with these bad boys and you’ve got yourself a dessert. Huzzah!

Not that they’re exactly leftover, but I also had these colourful mini paper muffin cups that I bought for some specific purpose ages ago and never really used up. Final source of inspiration? My sister got married recently and their colours were Neopolitan ice cream colours. I love the look of Neopolitan ice cream, and the concept of eating all three flavours together, or, if you’re just in the mood for strawberry, ignoring the other two flavours entirely. This of course could be problematic if you live in a household where everyone hates a particular flavour stripe. You open the container dreaming about eating a little scoop of chocolate stripe and then “AWWW MAN!!! What jerk ate all the chocolate????!!!” or something to that effect, and then belatedly realizing that that that jerk was probably you *embarrassed face* 😉 . This becomes even more embarrassing if you live alone (unless your neighbourhood happens to be home to the notorious freezer bandit – you know, that guy (or girl 😉 ) who breaks in just to raid your freezer of all of it’s chilled and tasty goodness).

Aside from finding these aesthetically pleasing, they’re also not even really that bad for you (unless you think maple syrup is bad for you. However, I have much scientific evidence to back up why you should really be consuming more of it. See here. What?? Don’t tell me you don’t Google bad habits that you have to try and find justification for why it’s not actually a bad habit. For instance, if you’re like me and don’t love making your bed every morning, have I got the justification article for you right here (I don’t recommend looking at/ reading this if you’re squeamish though). Ok, ok, if you insist, I’ll give you a miniature crib sheet for some well known bad habits and, with the use of a little verbal origami, how to turn them into, if not good habits, at least acceptable ones 😉 :

“I drink too much beer/ wine” – Make sure you’re buying from a craft brewery or a localish winery and now you’re supporting the economy. Way to go good corporate citizen! (this is now something you can honestly put on your resumé 😉 ).

“I drive my car too fast” – You’re really just testing to make sure your car is in good working order. It’s also a trial run in case you’re ever being hunted down by the mafia, you want to be prepared to be able to perform evasive maneuvers at high speed (note: I am not really endorsing driving like a crazy person. One of my biggest pet peeves is actually tailgating, so if this is you, it annoys me way too much to even pretend to find a reason why that’s acceptable. I personally feel that if you’re leaving enough space, driving fast is safer than driving way too close at 40km/hr. Rant over and out.)

“I’m just lazy…way way too lazy (even saying this sentence tires me out)” – Look, anyone who complains to you that you’re too lazy, point out the fact that, if you were less lazy we might all find out that you’re actually a psychopath, and you might go on a crazy murdering spree (or possibly become a freezer bandit). You’re actually keeping the world safe one nap/ reality show at a time.

Benefit of these cups though? No justification required. Consume, swoon, repeat 😉